if promises were not meant to be broken

If promises were not meant to be broken

I wouldn’t be hearing mommy’s scream at night

wishing it was all just a dream.

Shivering at the coldness of the floor where she chose to sleep

stressing the fact that daddy’s not there

to hold her and keep her warm.

If promises were not meant to be broken

I wouldn’t be scared at night

waiting for a tragedy to happen,

forcing the reality to sink that it’s just

mommy and me.

No more “honey, daddy’s home!”

nor midnight reminders of choosing the right guy,

knowing who’s the right guy, and that daddy’s

the only good guy.

No more kisses on the forehead before I go to sleep,

or even unplanned trips.

If promises were not meant to be broken

I wouldn’t be cautious and suspicious

of everyone, of me, of reality.

I wouldn’t be afraid of those loving stares,

of those comforting hugs.

I wouldn’t be screaming in my dreams

begging for you daddy to come back

your little girl needs a hug.

I wouldn’t be spending my nights

covering my ears with pillows

because mommy’s sobs

are stabs in my heart.

If only…

If only promises were not meant to be broken.

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